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nasturbate:

snapchat is an art

2 days ago on August 26th, 2014 | J | 92,999 notes

mydogsnokes:

o yea the 90s. the 90s were great. fuckin sick. raw as hell. learning how to speak. crying for no reason. shitting in my diaper

2 days ago on August 26th, 2014 | J | 485,207 notes
2 days ago on August 26th, 2014 | J | 42,637 notes
Tagged as: #lol me 

justcauseyoucouldntgetlaid:

something—secondguessed:

the-goddamazon:

salon:

And it’s USB rechargeable.

WHAT A TIME TO BE ALIVE

Hahahahahahahahahaha

2 days ago on August 26th, 2014 | J | 43,024 notes
Tagged as: #welp 
plays

ryannxp:

Jay’s reaction is everything

2 days ago on August 26th, 2014 | J | 78,267 notes
Tagged as: #bessssssssssst 

audibleobesessions:

aud.ob

2 days ago on August 26th, 2014 | J | 251 notes
Tagged as: #babes 

unfollowlng:

seenaill:

unfollowlng:

If you think your mom overreacts just remember once my mom cancelled our trip to New York because I refused to eat the meatloaf she made

my mom accused me of selling my birth certificate and social security to the black market when she couldn’t find them

you win

2 days ago on August 26th, 2014 | J | 147,603 notes

spork:

It’s called an ORgasm, not an ANDgasm. We’ll get you next time babe…

2 days ago on August 26th, 2014 | J | 41,336 notes

urulokid:

poutineisdelicious:

xekstrin:

majere636:

arachnofiend:

marapetsrules:

bobfoxsky:

“You fool. No man can kill me.”

How many times am I allowed to reblog this before it gets weird?

image

Fun facts: Tolkien constructed this scene because he came out of Macbeth thinking that Shakespeare had missed a golden opportunity with the ”Be bloody, bold, and resolute; laugh to scorn the power of man, for none of woman born shall harm Macbeth” prophecy

Being letdown by Macbeth is apparently a significant factor in Tolkien’s writing because the Ent/Huorn attack on Isengard was the result of his disappointment that the whole “til Birnam Wood come to Dunsinane” thing was just some dudes holding sticks and not actual ambulatory trees.

so he basically took his favorite shakespeare headcanons and put them into his AU fic

This revelation just knocked me over.

LET ME TELL YOU A THING ABOUT JOHN RONALD REUEL TOLKIEN. BACK THE FUCK UP SIT THE FUCK DOWN YOU KNOW NOTHING ABOUT ANYTHING YOU’RE FUCKING JON SNOW HERE. LET ME TELL U A THING

JONNY T WAS LITERALLY THE BIGGEST FANBOY TO EVER WALK THE EARTH. LITERALLY THIS FUCKIN NERD WENT INTO WORLD WAR ONE AND WROTE NORSEFIC EDDA FANFIC IN THE TRENCHES AND SENT IT TO ALL HIS FRIENDS WHO WERE PRESUMABLY LIKE “JOHN WHAT THE FUCK”

BUT IT DOESN’T END THERE

HIS WIFE? MADE HER AND HIMSELF INTO SELF-INSERT OCS IN SAID FIC. ALSO MADE HIMSELF A TOTAL TYR SELF INSERT CHARACTER. ALL VERY DRAMATIC. KEPT WRITING THIS FIC UNTIL IT WAS HUGE. AFTER HE DIED HIS SON PUBLISHED IT AND CALLED IT THE SILMARILLION. JRR YOU FUCKIN NERD

WAIT I’M NOT FUCKING DONE YET. TREEBEARD? BASED THE WAY HE TALKED OF HIS OLD FRIEND JACK WHO YOU ALL MIGHT KNOW AS CS LEWIS. THAT’S RIGHT. THAT NARNIA MOTHERFUCKER. WROTE HIM INTO LORD OF THE RINGS AKA THE SEQUEL TO THE SEQUEL OF HIS ORIGINAL FANFIC MASTERPIECE. CS LEWIS FUCKING HATED LORD OF THE RINGS. TOLKIEN FUCKING HATED NARNIA. BASICALLY THEY STARTED THE OXFORD PROFESSOR LIVEJOURNAL CLUB AND THEY FLAMED EACH OTHER’S SHIT RELENTLESSLY YET REMAINED BFFS

SHELOB? FUCKING TARANTULA BIT J-TIDDY ON THE FOOT WHEN HE WAS LIKE 3. WROTE IT INTO LORD OF THE RINGS.

HIS AUNT’S HOUSE? NAMED BAG END. YEAH YOU GUESSED IT WROTE IT INTO LORD OF THE RINGS

THIS FUCKING DORKUS SUPREME MADE UP HIS OWN LANGUAGE. WAIT NO IM WRONG. HE MADE UP LIKE 80 LANGUAGES AND DIALECTS AND ALPHABETS AND SHIT 

BEST PART OF ALL?? HIS OWN LAST NAME, TOLKIEN, WAS DERIVED FROM THE GERMAN “TOLKHUN” MEANING “FOOLHARDY”. DOES THAT RING A BELL TO ANYONE FAMILIAR TO LORD OF THE RINGS??? BECAUSE YOU SHOULD KNOW THAT PEREGRIN “PIPPIN” TOOK’S LIKE FUCKING CATCHPHRASE WAS “FOOL OF A TOOK”. TOLKIEN FIC’D HIS OWN FAMILIAL LINGUISTIC HISTORY INTO HIS WORK WHAT A DWEEB

IN 2008 HE RANKED 6TH ON A LIST OF THE TOP 50 BRITISH WRITERS SINCE 1945. HE WAS A PROFESSOR OF LANGUAGES AND OTHER IMPORTANT STUFFY SHIT AT OXFORD

AND JRR TOLKIEN WAS THE BIGGEST DWEEB EVER TO LIVE

THE END

2 days ago on August 26th, 2014 | J | 377,637 notes
2 days ago on August 26th, 2014 | J | 39,110 notes

godlessdreams:

she then grills him a cheese

2 days ago on August 26th, 2014 | J | 107,856 notes
teacher: y r ur eyes red
me: allergies
teacher: yea ur allergic to that dank ass kush
me: hell yea
teacher: hell yea
2 days ago on August 26th, 2014 | J | 191,214 notes

womptacular:

i’ve said it before and i’ll say it again:

the big bang theory is not a smart comedy. it relies on cliches and stereotypes that are offensive to everyone they reflect. there is little to no originality in any storyline or relationship.

the funniest thing about this show is that people compare it to 30 rock, parks and rec, louie, veep, etc

there is a difference between a smart show and a show that happens to have nerds on it.

2 days ago on August 26th, 2014 | J | 13,601 notes
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Played: 456,145 times.

easyvirgin:

image

2 days ago on August 26th, 2014 | J | 56,183 notes
hestmord:

this is 90% of people who say offensive shit “ironically” imxp

hestmord:

this is 90% of people who say offensive shit “ironically” imxp

2 days ago on August 26th, 2014 | J | 67,963 notes